So that I am clear with myself and everyone else . . . I AM A FREE AGENT. I am an independent artist. I am a dancer who partners. I am a performer, a director, a choreographer, a teacher. I am affiliated with several different companies. And this makes me who I am. I am a diverse, always changing, growing, and adapting creature. One might say that I have no identity or that I belong to nothing. One may also say I am part of everything. Maybe it's easier to just pick which group or identity "you" want to label me in any given moment. I realize the delicate balance this all requires. It is that balance that I intend to seek and pursue in my life. I know I am not one thing or title. And I can not be claimed by one person, or group, or idea. And that frees me to be who I really am.
As a woman, as a "follower", this skill of being solid with who you are, yet flexible with movement is exceptionally important to the dance. I think strengthening and playing with these contrary ideas is what one needs to be a phenomenal partner.
I used to think I wanted to be "So and So" but that changed as I met new talented role models who I then wanted to emulate. Now I realize I can not be any of those people. It is impossible for me to re-create anything or anyone. I have to discover "me" and be who "I" am suppose to be, so that eventually I am that role model for some one else.
It's hard in this dance, as a follower and someone's partner, to find that personal identity. I value the intense work I do with one partner, but equally I value my ability to work with others and maintain the skill of improvisation. If I can keep these two things in balance, then I think I will feel complete. And the feeling of completeness is not based on finding my other half or the perfect partner; it's realizing that being complete is something I do within myself. So I am focused on being a better, more powerful, and inspiring ME. Then I can truly work with and contribute to any group or partnership.
